Something has always bothered me about how D, my soon to be ex husband divides the money in our household. Now that I have a paycheck he can't keep all the money away from me. After the bills are paid, gas for the car is bought and we buy groceries he likes to split the money up between us. Well, that is when he allows me to have money. That has always bothered me and I couldn't put my feelings into words until today.
My money is used for clothes for the kids, books for them to read, supplies for school projects, ink for the printer, and other things like that. I have no idea what his pocket money is used for. I know he complains if he needs to buy anything for the kids, even if it is from the dollar store.
Just now he again talked about splitting the money up and I finally said, what about expenses for the children? Whose pocket do they come out of? I simply suggested a split that takes their needs into account. I had no idea that he would blow up about it.
Of course the kids were waiting in the cold car for him to take them sledding. He was to busy arguing with me about using money to get things we might need for the kids. B needs tights and P needs socks. They need things too. If it comes out of my portion of the money then I should get a larger portion, if it comes out of his than he should. But seriously the time to argue about it is not when the kids are in the car waiting to go sledding.
A plus is that do have access to the money again, although the negative of him being mad about how he thinks I will spend it (before I have even touched one penny of it) is a huge weight on my shoulders. I keep setting some aside and watch my fund for getting out of this marriage grow each week. Every week my freedom gets a little closer.
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