Monday, May 9, 2011
A few months ago I bought some decorations for the kitchen, I decided on a kitchen witch theme, I was worried that my husband would have a problem with them because he is so anti-witch and anti-pagan. I tenativly hung one up on the wall and there were no protest from him so I added the other decorations. I thought maybe finally he was going to let me be me and not fight with my religion anymore.
Since then I have added a few other items and a couple aprons. I loved working in the kitchen with some of my touches in it. The paint and other decor were still in the motif of the past owners. Before I added these decorations I felt like a guest in someone else's kitchen.
This weekend I walked into the kitchen and my decor was missing. I found it on a shelf almost hidden and put the items back where they belonged. Then I made the mistake of asking him why they were moved. He replied that it wasn't Halloween and they looked stupid so he took them down. I explained they were the decor I picked for the kitchen. He has always said that I had carte blance to decorate our home. Unfortunetly he complains about all the decorating I do. There was no more argument and I thought that maybe I had won this battle.
I was wrong. Today I went to pick up my sons perscription. The first pharmacy coudln't fill it, they were out of that medication. I took the time to find out that information and told him that I was going. My husband wanted to be the one to run the errand and he made a point of letting me know that before I left. He had to tell me that I was a useless house keeper so I can't do anything right so he should pick up the meds so he knows it will be done right.
I didn't take the bait and just left. My son came with me and we had a very nice time together. I came home and walked into the dining room to see all my spring/Easter deorations gone. I wanted to put them away together into a bin so I could use them again next year. Since I didn't have a bin I had saved some money from last week and was going to buy the bin on Friday when he got paid.
Not once has he expressed annoyance that they were still up. Because they were also spring decorations I didn't think they were too out of place. But they were all gone, he then told me that he had thrown most of them away when I asked him where he put them. I was so mad. There was nothing wrong with them. I had to pick them out of the garbage. Of course then he has to tell me I am stupid for going through the garbage. I retrieve them and packed them away in a plastic bag. Now I have to hide them so he doesn't think they are garbage again.
I went upstairs. It is my safe place usually. More often than not he will stay downstairs if I am upstairs. We can exist like this for a while without much interaction. The house is more peaceful and I am less stressed. However he did come up and announced he was leaving for work. Finally, I can have some peace. I waited until a few minutes had passed and I came downstairs to have my dinner. He was still here and on the computer.
So into the kitchen I go and my kitchen witch decorations are gone again. I had to look for them a little harder this time. He just doesn't have any respect for me or my things and I know it is only going to get worse. This time he also moved my Tarot recipe cards. Each card has a recipe on them and honestly if recipe cards don't belong in the kitchen where do they belong?
I know he will keep taking them down, I just hope he doesn't get destructive with them or throw them away like he did with my Easter decorations. I am so tired of his negative energy and I hope I can find a place to move to soon. So far I have not found a place that would be a good fit for me and the children. Until then I have to listen to his mouth and feel his attitude. I don't think the decoration battle is over. I will have to keep a close eye on things that mean a lot to me.