Tonight we went to a book fair. This is something that has always caused friction between us. I am a reader. I love books, I need books. To me it is unthinkable not to have books all around me. He has no interest in literature. He challenges me almost every time I buy books because in his mind they are unnecessary and something that is frivolous.
The children have a library, it takes up several book shelves and as often as the kids pick out books to read, they also use the books as toys. They stack them and play school. They use the books as plates for a pretend restaurant and also for the menus. The book can be almost anything. To me that is using their imagination, to him they are a source of clutter and a mess. Often they are, but they are never collecting dust and I watch them page through the books trying to read them and every night we read a pile or two of books. Books are a huge part of my house.
The book fair was buy one book get one book free. How can I pass that up? Before I even get there I anticipate the trill of new books for the children. It is always nice to introduce a new book to the children. Then I recall all the other book fairs we have been to. The complaining about spending money on books, the feeling of aggravation because I have to limit the kids to just a few books when it is clear to me they want more. It is so hard to say no to books.
One of the things I did differently was wearing the right clothes. When you walk into a situation that most likely aggravate you, you don't want to be overheated because you are wearing the wrong outfit. The school is always to warm for me and I always get annoyed extra fast because I usually forget that it will be to warm. It may seem like nothing but I know if I am annoyed that I am too warm any little thing can set me off.
Still some sort of effort had to be made by him. P picked out two things (not books, though the deal was if he got them then I would pick out two books for him) and paid. Then B found her two books and paid. Then I found the books for P and a couple bonus books (the educational ones of course). Not once did he complain out loud. He didn't roll him eyes. He was actually pleasant.
So tonight we read brand new books. We learned a bit about South Carolina too. We enjoyed the books and not once did I get grief from him about spending our money stupidly. Not once did we even bicker a little bit. So I firmly believe that both of us are putting some effort into us. Still we are in separate rooms I the house and I still sleep alone. I hope this is a step back to us.